Because of this, I decided to play a little game with myself, and see if I could find a benefit in every seemingly negative thing that happened to me, for just one day. It's actually a pretty fun and creative way to deflect stress and stop dwelling on the unpleasant things that happen in a day, from rude store clerks (who give you the opportunity to practice patience) to a kid coming down with a cold (providing you with a chance to 'baby' them again, if just for a day or two).
I'd love to see you challenge yourself to play the game, too. Just for today, see what benefits you can find in your stressors. (You can share them in the comments, or post about it in the forum.) And if your day is a little less stressful, why not make it two?
Related Resources
- The Benefits of Optimism
- How (And Why) To Develop an Attitude of Gratitude
- Are You An Optimist? Take The Quiz and Find Out!
Source: McCullough ME, Root LM, Cohen AD. Writing about the benefits of an interpersonal transgression facilitates forgiveness. Journal of Consulting Clinical Psychology, October 2006.
Hi, Elizabeth
Try to see the good in the bad. That is a good description. Yesterday I was supposed to meet a friend at 11 am. she did not show up. I first was disappointed, then I started giving her excuses, then I thought I’d better make it up for ME. I ordered my tea and cake and enjoyed talking to the owner and we became friends and possible business.
I love it. It sounds like you had a much better time than you would have had. Good for you!
Elizabeth
We are a holistic wellness enterprise. During our workshops on Stress Management with various organizations we always talk about ‘Forgiveness’, as we sincerely believe that many a times one’s stress level is high due to some deep-rooted anger or frustration towards another person. Through processes like journaling, cathartic writing, counselling, we broach thiss issue of forgiveness for emotional relief.All this benefitting employee attitude and morale on the long run.
you say to find the good? well how do you find the good when your daughter was molested, your mother sleeping with your husband or your brother wanting to prostitute you at age twelve? help me see the positive in any of those? it’s been a long life of painful memories i wish to let go of! i don’t know how to finds the good in over half of them? any advice.
hey Leslie, you should move to another place AWAY from them. I was so mad to my brother (for some valid reasons) that I have to go away from home in order to not see him. I was happy for my decision. Through those days, I feel like everything was about me. I work to feed myself, satisfy my needs, I make myself happy through any mode of juvenile. I WAS GLAD i did that. On that moment, I learned, you may not put your life away from them, BUT at least, we still have a choice to not let them ruin our lives. Life is such a gift. Let them ruin your day but dont let them ruin your life. Forgiveness can come afterward. At this life, you really have to think of yourself first, before anybody else. We can never do what we have to do, If we feel empty inside.
perhaps these are times faith plays a significant role.
at least u’re lookin for a way out or else u wouldn’t have landed on this page.i’m having a hard to forgive too..
Leslie, I truly understand your feelings strongly. I think you are missing the point, though. Forgiveness is not one condoning what was done wrongfully to you or even to forget. Forgiving is to help you move on so you don’t become a bitter and unhealthy person emotionally, and or, physically. Anger and bitterness does such things. Forgiving (letting go) is for your serenity and well being. Velle Cacha has some valid points. Don’t let what happened to you destroy you, your happiness, rather let it go, move on for the soul purpose of you enjoying tyour life you have for we only have one as far as I know. Holding on kills, letting go heals. Trust me. I hope I have helped. ;-D
Love <3