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Readers Respond: What Causes You Stress, and How Do You Manage It?

Responses: 21


Updated June 01, 2009

We all have situations in our lives that cause stress. And while many of us are stressed by the same things--demanding jobs, super-busy schedules, critical relatives--not everything causes stress equally in all people. What are your main causes of stress? And, if you've found any success in dealing with these stressors, what has worked for you? Share your answers, and read about other readers' experiences.

Going Through A Lot of Changes

I lost my spouse at age 37 that I was with for 23 years. I have tried to move on...found a wonderful man, but lost my job and he had no choice but to take me in. I feel like all I do is an obligation to pay him back for all he has done for me. I am also trying to find work. Which hasn't been easy. And the man I am with has never had to deal with someone that deals with anxiety and is having trouble with trying to fix it. It isn't something to fix. I have reassured him of that. But I am still having a lot of anxiety of how things have gone in our relationship. It has gone ass backwards. Not a normal relationship in my book. I don't know how to deal with this. I don't know what to tell him as to how to handle it. I have lost all faith in how things were before I lost my spouse of 23 years who understood my condition. I feel like a loser and have no idea how to teach him how to help.
—Guest Dawn

Your Stresses Demonstrate A Compass

Your stresses demonstrate amazing compassion for things. We focus on replacing your stress memories rooted in a fear of something, with better outcome stresses. You feel connected to others, have more vitality, and create a new purpose or value in what you do.
—Guest HumanSustainabilityInstitute

Familiarity breeds Contempt

Have you ever heard that phrase before, about familiarity? To me, I find that phrase to be very true, and especially around the holidays! Face it, when a holiday comes around, it's time to see the relatives. Your mean brother, your wacky sister in law, your rude uncle, etc.. Why do we have to deal with this I ask? It causes me SO much STRESS to have to deal with any one of my family members around the holiday.. There's way too many high expectations from others!!

My Uncertainty Causes Me Stress

Being in a position that demands more from me than I can give. I am trying to work on a relationship that really challenges me on a lot of emotional levels. I find myself stressed when I have to do all of the communicating in order to get anywhere. I want to work things out, but not knowing how the other person is going to react scares me .
—Guest Ruby

Fighting With A Friend

Most of my stress is from one-sided fights with my friends. I feel like I'm the cause of it, although they take it out on me. I've gotten so bad to where I hate myself and can't sleep or eat. Nothing I do is right. I've started withdrawing into myself and I can't think straight. I just stay by myself mostly now.
—Guest Lane

Stress Not Managed!

Mother has Alzeimers and I am her sole caretaker. She is 87, no Medicare or Medicaid, so no help from anybody. I have 9 and 7 year old grandchlidren living with my husband and I. My stress level is so high that some days I drink too much and I'm also on pain pills for my bones but tend to overtake them as they give me a bit of an "up". I want to quit all of it but I can't do it with all that is going on. My mother doesn't want anybody but me with her. She moved to this country 8 years ago and will not make friends. Plus she's nearly deaf. I would love to have some retirement time with my husband but my mother's health is not to where I see us on our own for many years to come. I really don't know what to do. Last night I really felt like just dying to get away from it all! Any suggestions?


I love educating, but "teaching to the test" and the demands it requires to get the kids to proficient is driving me crazy. I have a hard time letting go at the end of the day.
—Guest Lindsay


I get stressed dealing with my emotions. When I am sad or upset with someone, I don't know how to work through that.
—Guest ak

Too Much Stress

I dont know how to control it. I have not had any luck. I have too many financial obligations, family stuff, church stuff, and other garbage that clutters my life.

Immature Step-Son

My step-son will be 20 in June. He just got a job last week and is ready to quit because it is too harrrrrrd. He thinks he is an adult now that he has a job. He is immature, irresponsible, and disrespectful. I just want him out of the house so he has to grow up and deal with it.

What Causes You Stress

A lot of things in my life causes me stress, and here is a list: 1) Living with an alcoholic father that causes verbal fights all the time; 2) A Lousy job; 3) Since I am learning disabled and because of my alcoholic father, I cannot have certian things in life. Example: my own bank account; 4) Not haveing a special somebody in my life; 5) No REAL friends to hang out with; 6) Being poor and having no money.
—Guest Matt

Just Get Stressed

I just get stressed at everything. Everything around me, everyone around me, starts to annoy me and stress me out. Simple things get to me. I eat well, I go to the gym very regularly, and I am sleeping better. I have a sense of humor failure. I am lost with what to do.
—Guest Michael

Feelings of Anger and Frustration ...

cause me stress. I realize that some things I can change and other things I can't. So I sleep on it and sooner or later I arrive at a solution :)
—Guest Glenda

Controlling anger

Watching cunning behaviour of people around me, exploiting others' disadvatages, makes me seethe with anger. As I can't do anything about it, I get stressed. I would like to be less sensitive.

What Causes Me Stress

I get stressed when I work too hard physically. When I go fast and hard the stress eventually has a negetive effect on me. I manage it be relaxing in my spare time. Excersise helps a little. I try to eat a nutritious diet and I try to avoid busy places on my days off.
—Guest phil
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