Thursday December 31, 2009
As a new year and a new decade rapidly approach, I see so much excitement and optimism in the people around me, and feel it in myself. People who are usually very go-getter-ish are, predictably, creating lists and goals for themselves, and getting things done so they can focus on the realization of these goals. But people who usually don't think about these things on a regular basis are putting thought into it as well, even if they're not putting all of the planning and energy behind it. Even those who 'don't believe in resolutions' (usually because of past years of disappointment) are at least resolving
not to make resolutions! (And I agree--read my take on
goals vs. resolutions if you haven't already--it makes a
huge difference!)
This year, I have a little extra for everyone on the spectrum--a focused plan for harnessing this optimism and excitement and actually reaching some of these goals--and then reaching more! All you need is to come back to this site and use some of the resources I send you; I'll make it simple, promise. To get the most out of the new year and see some progress on your goals (including setting the right ones to achieve the results you want!), sign up for my free twice-weekly newsletter.
For now, as you celebrate the new year, think about the changes you'd like to see in your life. (You can write them in the comments section if you like, just to make them more 'real', or you can add them to this Reader Response article on New Year's Resolutions.) Then come back tomorrow and in the coming weeks and get some free support in making them happen!
Have a safe and fun New Year's Eve!
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Monday December 28, 2009
Soon, we'll be seeing a new year--a new decade actually! If there were ever a time to use the changing of the years as a motivational tool for positive change, this is it! (Well, actually, ten years ago, the turn of the millennium provided the
ultimate momentous occasion, but this will probably be the best we've had in the ten years since.) Looking back over what worked and didn't work in 2009, and so far since the 1900s became the 2000s, can help you hone your vision for what you want to continue into 2010, and what you'd like to change.
First, think of the difficult times. What did you learn? What do you not wish to repeat? What, within your control, can be changed to avoid repeating the same difficult times?
Next, look at the good times. What did you love? What are you proud of? What led to a big reduction in stress? What can you learn from the good times, and how can you got more of those great feelings?
Today, I'm not challenging you to make changes. I'm just inviting you to notice some things. When you're contemplating this idea, notice what worked and what didn't in the past; these things may pop out at you, or they may take a while to think about. Also, think about what's working and what's not working for you right now, and in the next few days. This is a helpful activity because it helps you get in touch with what's stressing you, and get in touch with yourself.
I suggest that you write about this in a journal, and really flesh out your ideas, preparing to take the next step in the not-too-distant future, but not pressuring yourself to do anything but think and notice things right now. In a few days, I'll have general suggestions of what goals to set for general stress relief, but each of us have some unique situations that provide special opportunities for positive change.
Goal-Setting Tips Using Journaling
What are you noticing? Feel free to leave your ideas in the comments section.
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Saturday December 26, 2009
We have family in town for the holidays. It's fun having them here, and seeing my lifestyle through the eyes of a fresh observer. (They know what my life is like, but not firsthand.) It's amazing how much more I notice things in my life when I know that someone else is noticing at the same time, and what people notice that I take for granted.
One thing that was noticed is that I have my house set up for stress management. I have a professional-quality massage chair that everyone likes to take turns using. This is wonderful for loosening muscles, diminishing physical and emotional tension. (Add some music through headphones and it's like going to another place!
I also have my bathroom set up to double as a home spa whenever necessary. (I take soothing, aromatherapy-aided baths every night!) Simply having some candles out, some soothing lotions and bath products, and some nice smells going can shift the whole feel of a bathroom, or a house.
Speaking of aromatherapy, I have essential oils on hand to burn when I need my environment to be more soothing, and music on hand for the same purpose. When I'm feeling stressed, I like to put some good food in my slow cooker, too, to fill the house with savory scents.
Just so you don't think this blog post is one big brag-fest, I'll also admit to another thing I noticed as I was getting ready for my family's visit: my house is more cluttered than I'd like it to be! I did some decluttering in preparation for their arrival, and am vowing to do more after they leave, so I can start the new year (the new decade!) with a feeling of being organized and in control of my surroundings. I also want to avoid the hidden costs of clutter I'm always writing about!
Look around your house. What would you notice if you were visiting, instead of living there? What do you like about the way you live, and what would you change if you could wave a wand and make it so? It's a good idea to notice these things this week, to have an idea of what goals you might want to set for the coming year, or what small changes might lead to a significant change in the way you feel in your life.
Resources for a More Soothing Home:
Friday December 25, 2009
If you celebrate the holiday like I do, I want to wish you a very Merry Christmas! And if you don't celebrate it, I'd also like to wish you a wonderful day filled with love and joy; this blog post applies to you, too.
Today is one of those great days when I'm very mindful of savoring the moment. As each gift is opened, I am fully present, enjoying the smiles on people's faces, the music we're playing, and the feeling of love in the room. I'm paying attention to details, so I can more fully savor the memories later. If my mind wanders to other less-happy topics, I gently bring it back to the present, happy moments. In a way, the day is like an exercise in mindfulness. This is a great way to spend the day; everyday stresses seem to have less staying power, a feeling of gratitude is palpable, and there's no time for anxiety or rumination.
Happily, this feeling--this state--can be experienced on days other than just Christmas, and can have a similarly positive effect. That's because, although there won't be gifts opened each day, the best present is staying in the present. (Like that? Hehe.) Research on mindfulness shows that this practice can reduce stress and bring many other benefits for health and well-being as well. And it's easy.
Today, whether you celebrate the holiday or not, I invite you to savor the day, to stay in the present as much as possible. And tomorrow, I invite you to do it again. Work your way up to creating a new habit for the new year, whether you practice mindfulness for a few minutes here and there, or try to maintain the state for hours at a time. And tell me if it has an effect on your experience. The following resources should help:
Mindfulness Resources from Elizabeth Scott
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